Mandy1971 1 year ago
Hi. I have been diagnosed with advanced bladder cancer and now have either abscesses or infected necrotic cancer in my liver. Antibiotics have not worked and 2 weeks ago, I was moved to a hospice and given weeks rather than months to live. I feel weirdly at calm with this. I've been through so much pain and I'm ready for peace now. My thoughts are though, that I don't 'feel' I only have possibly weeks to live. I have no pain, no discomfort anymore (not now I'm in the hospice. I was very uncomfortable in hospital). I'm taking steroids which has dramatically improved my motivation, appetite, mood. I feel almost 'good'. So how can I be near death? Could the medication really be that good at masking all the horrible things that are going on inside my body? I don't know how exactly this is going to kill me or when it will be and this is making me feel quite apprehensive. Has anyone else experienced this themselves or from a loved one? I really would appreciate your thoughts as I really don't feel like I'm going to physically die, even though I've been told I am.