I’m so sorry to read about the recent loss of your wife, who you no
doubt have spent most of your life with.
Guilt can be such a common reaction when a loved one dies and people
often tell us that they feel they should have or could have done more. It can
be normal during this difficult time to feel the need to place blame upon
yourself as you try to process what has happened, but it’s especially important
to get support with how you are feeling and to try to be kind to yourself right
now, even though this may sound very difficult to do.
Tears can be a natural way of relieving stress in our bodies and crying after
someone dies can be completely normal, particularly when the loss is so very
recent, but if you find that you are spending the entire day in tears or
constantly overwhelmed then you may choose to discuss this with your GP who may
also be a source of support to you.
People often tell us that talking can be a helpful experience and that
having a safe space to share how you are honestly feeling can be a comfort. Our
Support Line is here to offer you a listening ear if you ever need to talk and
you can reach us on Freephone 0800 090 2309.
Do you have much support in the form of family or friends right now?
Some people choose to confide in people that they are close or familiar with, whereas
others prefer to talk to someone that they don’t know like ourselves. Whichever
you choose, please don’t feel that you must go through bereavement alone.
We feature information about getting support during bereavement on our
website which you may find helpful here: https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/support/bereaved-family-friends/dealing-grief/bereavement-or-grief-counselling
. We also have a page on the common stages of grief, and grieving in your own
way which you may find of interest here: https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/support/bereaved-family-friends/dealing-grief/grieving-your-way
Please feel free to reply to this message as a way of getting further
support from us and others if you would prefer to talk through here rather than
over the phone.
Sam – Support Line Team