Can a relative refuse to have a terminally ill patient at home.

Katecox 4 years ago

3 replies

My father is currently in hospital. He has terminal prostrate cance and was admitted 2 weeks ago with a life threatening chest infection.amazingly he survived but the hospital is not certain the infection has gone. They wish to send him home with 4 nurse visits a day and no overnight care. My mum is 90 and unable to cope when he tries to get out of bed while the nurses aren’t there. Can we refuse to take him home? There is a local nursing home that would take him under NHS continuing care

Brigette 4 years ago

Hi Katecox,

I am sorry to read about your father's diagnosis and everything your family is experiencing. Have you been able to have any conversations with him at all about where is preferred place of care is? Does your Dad have the mental capacity to make a decision about where he would like to be cared for too? Do you, or your mum have a Power of Attorney for his health and well-being? 

We have a booklet that looks the options available here. This may help you to consider what the options are. 

If you feel it would be unsafe for him to be discharged home it is important that you share this information with the team at the hospital.  

If you have any other questions or would like to discuss this with the team please do get in touch with us on Freephone 0800 090 2309. Hopefully others reading this who have been through similar experiences will be able to share their thoughts with you.

Take care- Brigette Support Line Officer 

Katecox 4 years ago

Thank you for your reply. My father has been requesting to come home but has now been deemed incapable of making reasoned decisions. To allow him to come home he would need 24 hour care as my mother can not look after him alone. We work 200 miles away so cannot be here every day. Does Marie curie over such care in the Ferndown, Bournemouth region?

Clare 4 years ago

Hi Katecox, while it may be hard to have been told your dad is no longer capable of making reasoned decisions, I hope it has helped you and your mum to have been given some clarity about this and eased her worry that he would simply be discharged home. It may be helpful to look at the information we have on mental capacity,

https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/support/terminal-illness/rights/mental-capacity

https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/support/terminal-illness/rights/deprivation-of-liberty

Unfortunately, we aren’t able to provide 24 hour care at home. We work in partnership with the NHS and so they may talk about a referral to our nurses as part of the care package they can look to put in place. We’ve more information about our nurses here - https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/nursing-services/what-marie-curie-nurses-do

Have the hospital had any more conversations with you and your mum about what the options may be now they have assessed your dad and are aware that understandably she cannot care for him in between the times carers would be there? If not it’s ok to ask them as many questions as you need to.

Please don’t hesitate to carry on talking with us here or on the Support Line.

Take care,

Clare – Support Line Officer