Newbie here

EmzyH 1 year ago

1 reply

Hi there new here

I am a single parent to a 5yo girl, a carer for my Mum and work part time. My mum was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer just over a year ago. She had her Right Kidney, Renal vein, renal gland and 12 lymph nodes removed and started on immunotherapy after she recovered from surgery.  But about half way through she had a very severe reaction to the treatment and had to stop treatment. Her last treatment was last October, while we were waiting for her to recover from the reaction her cancer has now spread to her lungs and bones. She started a new advance immunotherapy about 2 weeks ago but its making her very poorly. I feel so distraught if i should give up work but don't know if i would cope financially, just feel so lost. I want to be there for everything for my Mum, but feel so burnt out as get little support from my family. It's really effecting me, as feel like i am just holding onto my job. i enjoy my work as it gives me a bit of normality but then feel rubbish being at work cause I'm constantly worrying about my Mum and if this is all effecting my lovely daughter.  Sorry for the ramble, just wanted to see if anyone had any advice or are going through something similar. Emma x

Alexia 1 year ago

Hello Emma,

Welcome to the Marie Curie Community. We are sorry to read about your mum and all that you are both going through.

It must be difficult to balance all the demands you have re your work, looking after your daughter and supporting your mum as well as looking after yourself which is also important.

I am sharing some links that might be useful one is a benefits calculator that may be useful whether you are working or not working Benefit calculator (entitledto.co.uk)

Have you explored what support there may be to help your mum at home? Is your mum currently receiving any care at home? I am sharing a link that might be useful about accessing care and support at home How to get nursing and personal care at home (mariecurie.org.uk)

This next link is about caring for someone and also caring for yourself which is important. Caring for someone with a terminal illness (mariecurie.org.uk)

If you would like to talk more about your experience, our Marie Curie Community is your safe space, to share as much or as little as you wish and to ask any questions you may have. Hopefully others here on the Marie Curie Community can share their experiences and insights, perhaps talk about ways in which they managed similar situations. Our Support Line is also here for you and if you would like to speak with one of our team with any questions or simply for a listening ear, we are on Freephone 0800 090 2309.

Take care

Alexia-Support Line Officer.