Coping with the death of my gran

2745221102 7 years ago

3 replies

About a year and a half ago my gran came to stay with my family because she was diagnosed with cancer for a second time. But unlike the first time, her cancer reached stage 4 within weeks and spread all over her body. For six month I watched her battle her cancer and lose. Six months ago she lost her battle. I thought I could cope but I have no one that I can talk to because of various reasons. My mum is coping with her own loss, and the death of my gran also deeply affected my dad. My aunt blames my mum for my gran's relapse and therefore she doesn't speak to us anymore. Our closest family friends are the only real family I have left but they have their own problems since both their mums have dementia. I have tried so hard to work through my grief alone but I can't do it anymore. I can feel that I am changing as a person and not in a good way. I am so sensitive that little family disputes affect me in a major way; I have become shy and quiet and put up a façade for school so I look happy on the outside (I am 15). I also get really bad nightmare about my gran dying and the family issues that I have. I don't know who I can turn to. I feel so alone. I am really sorry to bombard any readers with my feeling but right now I really need so advice.

Support 7 years ago

I am sorry to read about the death of your Gran, and how much you are struggling. Grief is a very individual thing and no two people will experience the same feelings at the same time. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, and how it affects you and how long it lasts depends on many things. We have information on coping with grief as a teenager here, and you may find it helpful to read through it.

You say you don’t know who you can turn to and I want to let you know you are very welcome to contact ourselves on Freephone 0800 090 2309. Other than us is there a teacher you like and trust at school? How about your GP? Alternatively there is a very good website run by Cruse Bereavement Care which is a safe place for young people to share their stories and talk to others in a similar position. You can find it here: http://hopeagain.org.uk/

Contacting Childline on 0800 1111 or online at their website (www.childline.org.uk) is another way that you can reach out for support any time of day or night, as this line is open 24/7.

You have taken a big step in reaching out for support via the community and any of the above organisations will be happy to support you. Many people tell us they find it helpful to talk through how their experiences and how they are feeling. If you would like a listening ear you can call our Freephone Support Line on 0800 090 2309 or drop us a line via Web Chat: https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help

Best wishes

Brigette

Marie Curie Support Line  

2745221102 7 years ago

I cant because of my parents...it is complicated

Support 7 years ago

Hi 2745221102,

Are you able to complete a webchat with us? Or can we call you? If so please send us a Private message with a contact number.

Best Wishes

Brigette

Marie Curie Support Line