Advice

Robin 9 years ago

1 reply

hi 

Im looking for advice.I have a terminally ill uncle in his 70s living in England.He has lived there over half his life.I dont live in the UK and unfortunately my uncle has requested i dont visit him any more as it is very upsetting for him when i return home.He is fortunate that his retired brother has moved in to help him neither are  married .I am the daughter of his sister who is too unwell herself to travel.His GP is very good to him and they have brought in nurses but they are agency and i think its a new face every day and night.Which is very upsetting for him i understand they have limitations too. re rosters etc.There seams to be no cohesion or care plan in place each new nurse has to have everything explained to them re meds etc.He is over 6 foot tall which can make it difficult to move him as he is now extreamly weak.He is frustrated and agitated that he cant do things himself.I suppose what im asking is, is there anything i can do or arrange for him which may help make things calmer and less stressful for him?Thanks.

Clare 9 years ago

Hi Robin,

I’m sorry to hear of your uncle’s illness. It must be hard to be so far away at a time like this, especially when he feels you should not visit anymore. You say his GP is very good to him, do you think your Uncle would let you ring the GP? This could give you a chance to talk about what is concerning you, especially your feeling that the number of different nurses and the lack of cohesion is hard for him to cope with. Have the difficulties helping your uncle to move been looked at by an occupational therapist? If not this could also be something to ask the GP about. I wonder if there is a specialist nurse, such as a Macmillan nurse, visiting him who he could talk about his understandable frustrations with?

Whether you are physically with him or not this is a stressful time for you and all the family, please remember we are here for you in the Marie Curie community.

Thanks

Claire