Dad's Dark Thoughts

melves 6 years ago

1 reply

My Dad has recently had a diagnosis of terminal cancer in his voicebox. He's unable to eat and is struggling with talking, his his life has changed drastically in the last 5 months, from being able to eat to being fed through a tube in his nose. When we had the consultation to inform that there wasn't anything that they could do for him , he told my mother and I that he was thinking of taking his own life somehow.

I'm not sure how he would do this, when he would do this or if he's thinking this through, but as he progressively gets worse I'm extremely worried that he will do something awful.

Has anyone else had experiences with these sorts of discussions/conversations?

Support 6 years ago

Hi Melves,

I am sorry to read about dad’s diagnosis. Many people talk to us about the intense and fluctuating feelings they experience when they have been given a terminal diagnosis. Hearing a loved one talking about taking their own life can be very stressful. It is important that dad can communicate how he is feeling and that you have some support in how to deal with these types of conversations. Have you or dad been able to make the healthcare professionals responsible for his care aware of these feelings?

I am aware that the Charity Mind feature some factsheets around suicidal ideation:

For dad the page on suicidal feelings may be helpful and can be found here: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/suicidal-feelings/#.Wss2Li7wZpg

And for yourself and mum who are trying to support dad at this difficult time:https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helping-someone-else/supporting-someone-who-feels-suicidal/#.Wss2Vi7wZpg

Here at the Support Line we are not qualified therapists but we are able to provide emotional support to anybody that needs a listening ear. If you would like to talk about things in more detail please call our Freephone Support Line on 0800 090 2309, or you can get in touch with us via Web chat: https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/help/support/marie-curie-support-line

Best Wishes

Brigette

Marie Curie Support Line