I lost my husband in Jan this year. He died at home with cancer, with in 3 month’s you were gone why didn’t you fight? My life is so empty without you. I find it hard to talk to anyone. My heart is broken and i just don’t want to live without you. I don’t really have any close friends who I feel I can share with. It’s just me now. Why did you have to go? I’ve never felt this alone in my whole life. I wish it was me and not you, you would of cope a lot better than me. I don’t know what to do anymore. I talk to your photo all the time you look so happy. I’m so sorry
I know exactly how you feel. I lost my wife on 30 May and miss her so much, we were real soul mates and did everything together until her health deteriorated so much and she became bed bound for her final months.
Just someone to talk to would be good.
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Dear Spidge123,
We are so sorry to hear that your husband died from cancer so soon after being diagnosed. Thank you very much for posting here. It is clear from your post that you are figuring out how to cope with the situation, and you are now taking the steps to find support. This forum is a safe space for you to share your thoughts, and I hope that others in the Community will feel comfortable to share their experiences with you.
It is normal for people to express how much they miss their loved one by saying that they don’t want to live without their loved one. However, we just want to check to find out more about what you mean by that phrase?
If you do have any plans to harm yourself we would encourage you to reach out to your GP, NHS 111 (option 2), or the Samaritans on freephone 116 123 (they’re open 24 hours and are there to listen).
I would also like to point out two ways in which you can access support and information from Marie Curie. One is the telephone support line, which is open 8am to 6pm Monday to Friday, and 10am to 4pm Saturday to Sunday and free to call on 0800 090 2309. The Marie Curie staff answering this support line will be able to advise you on available support.
The other is the telephone bereavement support, which helped me a lot when I was recently bereaved and was looking for a friendly, independent person to talk to safely once a week. These weekly talks gave me so much strength, just to know that there was some time each week that there was someone who would listen to my memories, worries, and thoughts. It will take a little time to set up, but in my experience the wait for an available volunteer was very much worth it. More information on this free service is available here: Marie Curie Telephone Bereavement Support
Take good care,
Anke
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Thank you. I’ll be ok. Ive just got to realise my husband isn’t coming home ever again and that he’s dead. I don’t really know why I posted, talking to strangers will not bring him back. He’s gone. I’ve just got to let go and hopefully my time will come sooner than later. Thank you again.
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You are always welcome to post here, Spidge 123. Thank you for writing again. You have gone from being with and around your husband on a daily basis to him not being around. I cannot imagine what this must feel like for you right now.
Some people who are recently bereaved find that taking time for a daily walk to think about their loved one, or just be in nature and let their thoughts drift, can be a comforting experience (it certainly was for me). This can just be five minutes - or longer, whatever one feels like. Many also report that just being around other people is helpful. Even just meeting a friendly person for a cup of tea. Would that be something you would feel comfortable doing?
The offer of receiving personal bereavement support on the phone from Marie Curie is here for you whenever you feel like taking it up. And this Community will continue to be a safe and friendly space for you to share your thoughts. I hope that others will feel comfortable sharing their experiences with you, too.
Take good care,
Anke
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So sorry for your loss. I will be in the same position soon. My husband is my soul mate and is running out of time. I’m 58 and have never had to live independently. He’s always been there to look after me. I’ve been spoiled. I don’t know how I will cope either. Hoping you find the strength to carry on x
I’m so sorry for you, I wish I had some words that could ease your pain. I just take it a minute at a time. I don’t know what else to do. Make sure you take care of yourself and except all the support you are offered. Don’t be stubborn like me. If ever you want to let of steam. You can always message me. Thinking of you. Sharon xx
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